As a parent it is vital that you work with your teen to help them understand their sexual development
Teen Sexuality
Part One
At some point or another teens and pre-teens start wondering about sex.
Our natural instinct is of course to react uncomfortably. Sexual development
however, is an important aspect of development and growth, just as important as
your teen's physical growth.
It is vital that you avoid ignoring your teen's sexuality, and instead embrace
it with knowledge and understanding.
The more educated you and your teen are regarding their sexuality and the
changes that are occurring in their body, the less likely you are to be
surprised by sudden emotions, actions or feelings.
Overcoming Your Fear of Sexuality
Sexual behavior and understanding about sexual behaviors may have important
implications for a growing teen, so it is vital as a parent that you overcome
any discomfort or shyness you have regarding sex and confront your teen
regarding all aspects of sex and sexual health as soon as they are ready.
You may have some questions about sex yourself, or at the very minimum may be
wondering what the best approach is to discussing sex with your teen.
Below you'll find a wealth of information regarding teen sex and sexuality that
will hopefully help you broach the topic with your teen.
Teen Sexuality-Something to Think About
Believe it or not, teenagers and pre-teens are just as hesitant to approach you
about sexual topics as you might be to approach them. It is normal for
adolescents to have questions about sex however, and you can be the primary
source of information and insight about sex if you plan things in advance.
As a parent it is vital that you work with your teen to help them understand
that sexual development is a vital part of health, as important as any other
aspect of their well being.
Sexual behavior may have implications not only on a teen's emotional well being,
but also on their physical well being.
A Teenager's Sexuality is not Simply Related to Their Gender
Sexuality
is in fact much more complicated. It may include the following:
Gender - Most teens will form a gender 'identity.' This is best
described as how an individual 'feels' about themselves, meaning whether
they feel more masculine or feminine, sensitive or insensitive. Gender
identity may be mixed, very strongly one way or the other.
Anatomy - This is a very simple concept. Basically, we are all
anatomically either 'male' with a penis and testicles or 'female' with a
vagina and ovaries. Anatomy is largely responsible for ones gender identity,
sometimes influenced by hormones.
Sexual Orientation - Teenagers just like adults will have very
powerful affinity and emotional attractions toward others. For many this
orientation is heterosexual, meaning boys are attracted to girls and vice
versa. However, you may find that your teenager is attracted to the same sex
or both sexes. This may be transient or permanent and may depend on a number
of factors including anatomy, gender identity, society and environmental
factors.
Sexual Development
Sexual development actually begins during the pre-teen years. During this time
your child's body produces hormones that initiate puberty. Breast development,
the appearance of facial hair in boys and growth of hair under the arms and in
the genital area are hallmarks of puberty.
Puberty also involves emotional changes. During the adolescent years pre-teens
and teens start feeling attraction toward others. The desire to be close to
others intimately is a natural part of the sexual development process.
The attractions that teens feel vary. Teens may find that they are attracted to
someone of the same sex for a brief time, and then find they are attracted to
members of the opposite sex, whether exclusively or not. The opposite can also
occur.
These varying transitions can be confusing for both teens and parents, but it is
vital to acknowledge them as part of the growth process.
A majority of teens will identify themselves as heterosexual, though some will
identify with homosexuality and still others will proclaim themselves bisexual.
It often takes many years for one to grow into their sexuality.
During this time, many teens feel confused over their feelings and attractions.
It is vital during the period of sexual development that teens have the support
and understanding as well as guidance of family members.
Most teens will seek out a trusted adult and peers so they have someone to talk
to openly about their fears, concerns and feelings. It is important to let teens
know that it is perfectly normal to have a desire to experiment with sexual
activity during this time.
However, it is equally important to educate teens of how such activity may
affect their health and the health of others.
